*sings* Oh yeah…. I’m awesome… Oh yeah… I’m smart…. Oh yeah… *stops singing*

I made my rubberbanding box program work. All by myself. without pulling an all nighter. Or even getting up before 8. Yeah. Cheaters, take that. (Basically, the program draws the same kind of boxes that windows draws if you drag your mouse across the desktop to select several icons. It draws a box which has an origin corner at the point you pressed the mouse button, and disappears when you release the mouse button). Yay for me!!

Oh yeah, I added the description of Edward on my quizes below… I though it really fit. Anyway….

I am treating myself to breakfast now to celebrate my genius. Biscuts and gravy, here I come….. Oh yeah, and maybe eggs….

Even Superman once worked in a team

Take the Cartoon Hero Quiz?.

The monkey on the original 1960′s Space Ghost.

Find out what secondary animated character you are.

The deranged inner child in all of us

Find out what anime girl you are.

Just thought I’d add the description here… it fits me pretty well:

Although you are a computer genius, you tend to borderline on cuteness vs. pyschosis. You are energetic, and most likely people have a hard time deciding if they should hug you or slap you.

Ooooo Shiney!

What Random Object From Ydoc Nameloc’s Room Are You?

Awwwww!

Find out what anime character cliche you are.

The Dark Lord

Find out what Cartoon villan you are.

checking the new server out…. hopeing ece is in fact more stable than ra (www2).

Happy happy joy joy… the network is back up.. for the moment. it seems like it’s been down more than up this semester… especially www2. Grr… I am seriously considering moving my blog to the ECE server… it only goes down if the whole campus goes down… which would be only slightly better than once every five minutes, but still… better is good. I’ll let y’all know if I end up moving my blog. Blah.

So this is what I got done this weekend: Design paper…. ummm….. yeah. I had to redraw the stinking pictures like, 8 times. grr. but it’s over now. Yay! I should get a marked up version back tomorrow, then I hand it off to a group member for the corrections to be typed.

Meanwhile, this is what I have to do this week (schoolwise): Two test re-works, a Mathematica project, finish a mathematica project, three lab reports, finish my micro lab, do the last half of last week’s circuits lab, plus this week’s circuits lab, study for a Calulus test, and figure out some circuits homework.

And socially (supposedly, anyway): Tuesday night is Insight at the Wesley, Wednesday night my dorm is throwing a god-awfully loud party and i am going to go get free food before retreating to some remote part of the campus, Thursday night is Haloween, and the annual Haloween fair, Friday night I told Matt I’d try to make it to Judgement House (he’s going to hell that night), and Saturday is not only game day, but the day of our Sunday School Harvest Party, as well. And Sunday I have church, which kills at least half the day.

So what am I doing right now? Writing in my blog and making myself sick on Wal-mart cupcakes, what else?

*la la la la-la* Hooray for going out. And having fun. And dancing. And getting called up to dance on the stage. And laughing at drunk people. And being really bad at pool. And drinking my weight in water. *smile*

And sleeping in. Sleeping in is nice.

On a much more random note, Esa dreamed last night that I was cheating on Chad with some random Wesley guy… and that the guy dumped me for another girl, and I was pissed. Go figure.

Blah. School work sucks. A lot. So this is what I have to do this weekend: type more on my (group’s) Design paper… write a lab report… work on a Micro lab… get started on a Mathematica project… I think that’s it. I hope. That’s all I’m doing, anyway.

blah… hell week is over. I think. And I’m going out tonight. *happy dance* Yeah. I think I need to get out more…. To sum up my week, it sucked. But it’s over. At least that. And next week won’t be that bad… we think.

But i haven’t even been able to post lately… the server that holds all the personal webpages for the school (www2) has been up and down so much lately… grr. And I haven’t had time to think, or write. Anyway….

Music is good. Music makes me happy (listeneing to my radio).

In other news, I’m going to spend Thanksgiving with Chad’s family…. Chad may or may not be there, which is odd… but it will be cool. So I’m going home the weekend before Thanksgiving. So my family will get ot see me.

Ok, enough rambling… need to think about food.

Today sucks. Life sucks. Grr.

So this is my story. I intended to get up at 7am this morning, and study for my two tests today, but I couldn’t get up this morning… so I got up at 8am. And my roommate told me I was lazy. And I went and studied for my micro test in the Cafeteria. I thought i had everything from the book and the lecture slides pretty well down when I headed to class… But the test wasn’t on the lectures. Or the slides. Or the book. In fact, I don’t know what the test was on… or how we were supposed to know how to work it. And the proctor (Dr. Little is out of town) had never taken a Micro course, so she was no help. So I’m pretty sure I failed the test. After talking to the rest of the class, I determined that everyone failed the test, but that’s not making me feel much better right now. So then, I go to computer science class, and Sean was upset because he got a bad grade on the presenation (85)… then I felt bad, because I didn’t organize more group meetings for him to practice his presentation… then we reviewed for Thursday’s test. And then, still bummed because I failed a test, I started walking to my Linear Algebra test… I looked both ways, and crossed in the crosswalk… And for the third time in as many days, I was hit by a car. They like, didn’t even stop at the stop sign… if I hadn’t stepped back, they would have hit me squarely…. but instead, all they did was catch me with their mirror. And that pissed me off. They didn’t look to see if I was ok, or anything… grr. So I walked on. I wanted to be destructive or something… so I went to kick a rock and hope it broke something… but I missed the rock (note: people with no depth perception shouldn’t kick rocks) and fell flat on my butt. Even more frustrated, I picked myself up, and continued on to my Linear test…. and I think I C’d it. Which really sucks, because I actually had an A in Linear. And because I knew the stuff… I just couldn’t concentrate. I couldn’t do it.

Which has been most of my problem this semester. It’s not that i have 18 hours… I’ve taken 18-19 hours before… it makes things a little rough, but that’s not what’s killing me this semester. It’s a combination of everything… Granny being in the hospital for the last month and a half… problems with Elisa… being sick… not having Chad here… looking at my friends who are graduating/have graduated and realizing that none of them have jobs… trying to figure out if I’m going to have a job *in Colorado* when I graduate (I was promised a job in Huntsville… but that doesn’t help me much right now)… trying to balance my finances… trying to explain to Elisa why I’m not moving off campus with her… trying to figure out what dorm I’m going to live in… not being able to breathe… having at least two teachers turn into total assholes… having my project groups give me huge amounts of stuff to do (“you’re smarter than us, so you have more time to do this stuff”)…. it all adds up. I can only take so much before I explode…. And I’m about there right now. I’m so close to graduation…. but I don’t know if I’m going to make it… I seriously don’t know if I’m going to survive this semester, much less handle three more semesters… I keep telling myself it gets better, but I’m not really sure it does.

I am so tired… I can’t concentrate… I can’t think… and I have two more labs to finish this week, plus two more tests and a project design document… all before Friday. Plus, Elisa’s pissy because I told her I’m not moving off campus with her… and now she’s trying to figure out how she’s going to find another girl to room with her and the guys. I just couldn’t deal with her AND Silas AND Corvelle… Elisa’s hard enough to deal with. I am so sick of her hunting me down when I’m out too late and asking me to come home because she’s lonely… and her using my computer… and wearing the clothes that I laid out to wear today… and whining about getting married… and lecturing me on the morals of TV producers, and my morals, and my life… And constantly reminding me that I cant finish anythng I start… I just can’t deal with it right now…

That’s the other thing. I’ve been putting off everything emotional… I don’t have time to deal with it, so I box it up somewhere, and claim I’ll deal with it later. But when is later? will i be any less busy this spring? Or summer? Will I ever deal with all this crap? or will I just let it pile up until I have a nervous breakdown? I don’t have time to deal with it now… but it will only be worse later. I think I need to take a weekend off… away from project groups and Esa and my family and everything… and go somewhere and sort myself out again. And then, maybe… Maybe I’ll be able to function like a normal person again.

But it’s not going to happen this weekend…. I have group meetings all weekend. But I did promise William that we would go out Friday night… so I’ll get a little time away. Which will be nice. In the meantime, I guess I had better go study. Or nap. Or something.

I need to get steak.

blah. If anyone has any clue why a hidden field in an HTML form would refuse to admit that it has a value, let me know.

So I am spending the evening in the library, since if I stay in my room, I’ll be put on a guilt trip for using my computer and not letting my roommate use my computer. And my program is being dumb. Or, more likely, I am being dumb, and my program is just doing what I tell it to… grr. but I have gotten a great deal of it done. better than nothing.

Oh well… maybe I’ll try to find a good fiction book to read before I leave the library… not that I’m going to have time to read before Friday, but one can hope.

“You know what I’d do if I had a million bucks?”

just a thought. roommates are gross. And they get pissy a lot. And I’m going to hell. She said so. And since my roommate is going to be the one that determines these things…. yep, I’m doomed. Hell forever. Yeah baby. For what, you might ask, am I being sent to hell? I’m not sure, exactly, but I think it has something to do with sex. Because, you know, I’m all about sex.